Morals...meh

I was recently introduced to the infamous television program called “Geordie Shore” by a close friend. I wish I could say that it was a load of bollocks, I wish I could say that it was filth and I wish I could say that I did not watch past episode one. I can indeed say none of this. I think I have a new obsession, it is like watching a documentary on human nature, it is so raw and detailed that it reminds me of the reaction to a car accident: you simply cannot look away. I started to wonder why I am enthralled while watching these young adults party, drink and “buck” their way through Newcastle. I can only guess that I am jealous, they have a life that many people dream of, hell I dream about it.

They have no inhibitions whatsoever. They bang whoever they want and whenever they want it. They quite possible drink every night for an entire month on the show and have no fear of what they will feel like the next day. Usually in an every day setting, the women would hold a little bit back. These girls hold sweet eff-all back and they are not ashamed to do so. Don’t we all wish for a life where there are no cares and only simple pleasures? I am envious that the only thing worried about in that house is what time to start getting their spray tan going and which boy they will go home with at the end of the night. This sort of lifestyle, while judged by many, has to be the highest form of freedom one can have in this day and age.

The sweet freedom of not-giving-a-deuce. What I would give to experience that kind of animosity for just one day let alone an entire month of pure animalistic freedom? I would give my figurative firstborn child to have that! I think we all have those days where we don’t want to get out of bed, maybe the cure to that inevitability is that you pop us in a fancy house with a truckload of booze and say, “Have at it!” If I were on that show I would be exactly like Charlotte. I would speak my mind, I would drink until my internal lights went out and I would not for the life of me fall in love until I was completely done wrecking Newcastle.

I feel like there is such a race to grow up, get married, get a job and pop out babies. If I could kick back and live my life a little bit before then I would go into the end of my days very content. Yes the stories are embarrassing and utterly useless at furthering your life but I never knew a thing about my grandmother. For all I know she could have been the biggest tramp on the block, all I knew was that I loved her. At the end of the day that is all anyone remembers of you; that they loved you. I plan to live fiercely from now on, don’t get me wrong now that I am a working woman and I have bills to pay, I am not about to run off and cause a riot. I just plan to speak my mind, dance all night long and every now and then get embarrassingly drunk. When I am old and wrinkly I will be sure that everyone knows I had the best time of my life.

What a cracker of a Planet Earth we would all be if we just all did what we wanted. If we were all internally good and there was no need for laws to keep us in place. If we were all happily free and blissfully unaware that there could be hurt. If we all were merry all the time and couldn’t care less about where our lives were going. I have said so often to my friends that I wish we could go back to the old days when we were all just pilgrims. We grew enough food for our family, we hunted enough meat for our village and we drank enough water from our river. Why do we need to sell our meat to our neighbour? Why do we have to get paid to fetch water for the village? Why do we have to plant more than a fair share of grain and try make a capital business of it all. Why could we not just stick to the basic and simple pleasures of life? We may not have evolved into the so-called super humans but we would also be a great deal less messed up. Going back to Geordie shore, their goals are simply to get drunk, go out and bring someone home with them. No relationships, no regrets and no responsibility. Lots of drama, yes, but no responsibility. How amazing is that?

I wish I could run around buck wild and go absolutely batshit crazy but for now I will take a small tiny leaf out of their book and live my life without the boring inhibitions.