There are only so many mistakes you can watch someone make
before you give up and go your own way. There are only so many times you can
bail your friends out of sticky situations and only so many times you can deal
with their garbage for them. There are special circumstances where you should
be granted a “get out of helping a douche for free” card. There are moments
when you need to look back on the situation as an outsider and say to yourself
that you are worth more than to be the prince charming for someone else all the
time. I was that person who always helped every living soul that needed help
until I was also the person having panic attacks because my own life was
falling apart and no one was helping me fix my problems. At the end of the day
if you surround yourself with people that constantly expect you to solve their
shitty lives then you are going to have friends who cant help you with your
life because they cant even fix their own. You are what you eat people, if you
choose to consume the bull that you are fed then expect that bull to follow
through in every other inch of your life.
I say this quite often but obviously I don’t feel like it is
said often enough: You need to take control of your own life. If you are
constantly flinging responsibility around then you are going to forget who you
are and what you are capable of. We need a world full of people that take
responsibility for themselves. We need to live in a world where we do not need
to look out for every one else’s actions but only our own. If you don’t have
one needy friend then I have some bad news, the needy friend is you. There is
one in every group just like there is one in every family. You need to let this
person land on their own two feet, if they don’t land correctly they will stand
up and learn that next time they should lift their arms before impact or bend
their knees a little more. Life is all about learning, we start off as blank
canvasses and slowly we add the lines and colour. If someone is constantly
using your brushes and your paints, you are going to end up with nothing for
your own canvas and they are going to end up being the person you were meant to
become with all of the colours you were meant to have. It is about time we all
started putting ourselves before everyone else just a little bit at a time. I
am not saying that we should be completely selfish because this is not what
being human is all about but don’t go to the extreme where you are so involved
in fixing someone else that there is no energy or time left to fix yourself.
Maybe I am a bit of a hypocrite because there was a point in
my life where everything was falling apart and all I needed was a helping hand
that I never got from anyone else. I am not going to lie, this made me feel a
little bit resentful of the people I chose to surround myself with but at the
end of the day: digging myself out of that hole was more rewarding than if I
had had a crutch helping me through everything. I think that we are given
obstacles for a reason and if you choose to let the obstacles build up instead
of taking them head on and fixing them then you cant expect anyone else to take
on your problems either. We all need a helping hand every now and then but when
I give you my hand, I don’t mean that you have rights to take my entire arm. Are
we all adults now? Can we all take our life into our own hands and be our own
salvation? We all have cause to make our lives better so why do we not start
doing it for ourselves? Let us all be highly effective people and change our
own lives for the better so that no one else has to drop their own issues and
save us from drowning in our own crud.
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